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The Transformation of a Heart



by Al Drucker





ILet me conclude with a personal note. For seven years following that first journey to India, I made twice-yearly pilgrimages from America to the lotus feet. On one of those trips, Swami told me to stop doing individual healing work and, instead, to teach. With Swami's blessing a school of alternative medicine and healing came up at our institute and became very popular among health professionals and lay people interested in holistic health. Just as we were at the height of success, Swami told me in an interview on a trip in early 1981, "Close everything up and leave it. Come be with Swami." And then he gave a little poem, which has stuck with me like a mantra. He said, "You don't need marriage, you don't need money and you don't need fame... all of those will lead to pain." He was speaking of the three goals of worldly life, the purusharthas as they are called in India. Leave them behind and put everything into reaching the fourth... “be free... be with me”.

I came back to America, terminated my affairs there and within a month left to settle in India. But now, years later, I realize that Swami was not referring to an outer change of residence but an inner transformation. And that doesn't come quite as quickly as buying an airplane ticket and getting rid of a few possessions. It is nailing the ego up on the cross. It is when the mother of mothers in her supreme love transforms into Kali with sword in hand. That is when the spiritual path seems more like entering a shark’s mouth, with all teeth facing inwards. From that point on, the only way to proceed is deeper and deeper inside while getting chewed up and absorbed along the way.

In one of his discourses, Swami once said, “I will bring you near me and make you completely ego-free. For many years it has been sweetness, kindness and soft persuasion; from now on it will be different. I will drag you to me. I will place you on the table and operate. It is my love that prompts me to save you. It is my love that prompts me to open your eyes before you get bogged down deeper in the swamp of worldly life.” For many of us, that process has begun. And so there will have to be other articles written with perhaps a slightly different theme, as the great surgeon proceeds with his operation and as the great jeweler fashions his ornament.

In one interview, Swami said to us, “When you want a precious jewel of original design, you must give the gold and rare stones to the jeweler, and then wait while he melts and bangs and twists the gold, and grinds and chips and polishes the stones, and designs the jewel. Then, when he returns the jewel to you, you will have something truly worthwhile. But in the middle of his work, just because you don’t like the ordeal that the gold and stones are being put through, can you ask for them back? No. You must be patient and forbearing and trust the jeweler. He knows what he is doing.”

Dear Reader, I leave you with that thought. Trust in our divine jeweler, he knows what he is doing. Again I salute you with my love and best wishes. May you receive the precious jewel conferring all blessings, and realize the blissful Lord, who is your own immortal Self.



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