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14. The Process of Awakening

 
 
Let us again summarize the whole process:
In the original state there prevails the pure Awareness, the I - I, without any knowledge or conditioning, without attributes, without form or identity.
Then, for no apparent reason other than that it is its nature to do so, there arises the thought or concept 'I am', the impersonal consciousness, on which the waking and the dream worlds appear with their many forms.
Consciousness identifies itself with these forms and thus starts the concept of bondage with an imaginary objectivization of the 'I am' into the duality of subject and object.
The phantom object, the individual, now seeks some other object, 'God', 'The Reality', 'The Absolute' to awaken it from the living-dream; but it is a futile search, completely misconceived, for there can be no objects with an independent existence outside of the dream world which would have the power and could be appealed to for help in breaking free of the dream state.
If nothing can be found outside then the only solution lies in reversing the process and going back to find out what is inside, who one originally was and always has been, before consciousness and the Maya-dream arose.
Then comes the 'awakening' and you realize that you are neither the body nor even the consciousness, but the unnamable state of total potentiality prior to the arrival of consciousness. While you are yet in consciousness, that Absolute state can only remain another concept. The thought that there is something that you are not is only a concept, and this concept is seeking the concept of what you really are. But, what you really are has mistakenly identified itself in relativity with what you are not, and the 'bondage' has arisen from this misidentification. Clearly, you cannot be that which you really are until you wake up from the dream of phenomenality, understand the dream as such, and stop conceptualizing and objectivizing. Here, no amount of knowledge can help. All knowledge is conceptual and, therefore, untrue. To abide in that pure state you must be that state, itself... non-dual, devoid of knowledge, devoid of conceptualizations.
Now the circle has completed itself. It becomes clear that what is being sought is the seeker himself, the pure subjectivity, the limitless potentiality, the unalloyed unity.
What, then, must be done to reach that state, to stop your unceasing conceptualizing and abide in the unity? Nothing can be done. What effort can an illusory, conceptual 'I' make to know its true nature? What effort can a shadow make to know its substance? Realizing your true nature requires no phenomenal effort. It will happen when it is given an opportunity to do so, when obstruction by conceptualization ceases. It will appear when it is given a vacant space to appear in. If someone else is to occupy this house, the conceptual 'I' must first vacate it and give enlightenment a chance to enter in. But any effort to stop thinking as a method of getting rid of conceptualizing is an exercise in futility... and so is any other kind of effort.
The only effective way is instant, direct apperception of the truth, without thought and conceptualization. There is no point in searching for truth through the medium of your proud intellect. Indeed, you will realize that the very effort of searching is an obstruction, because the instrument with which you are searching is the divided mind... a conceptual subject seeking a conceptual object. Give up the search and let the impersonal consciousness take over, and it will let you in on the mystery of its own source, the pure 'I', the essential subjectivity, the nameless, formless, limitless, timeless, spaceless, imperceptible One, without a second. Then you will realize that all phenomena, all experiences, all ideas, all thoughts, all words, all knowledge, all conceptualizations, all efforts, all time and all space, all teachings, all hierarchies, all paths, anything and everything you can conceive of... is patently false. When you see the false as false, then what remains is true. What is absent now will appear when what is present now disappears. Negation is the only answer.

 
     
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